pesky strings

A few posts ago I shared a dream or vision that God gave me. I will share with you now the second part to that dream. I remember the picture I drew in my journal years ago; it was so clear.

I had been walking through the fields (in relationship with God) and I came to a cliff that descended directly into a seemly bottomless pit. On the other side of the pit was land carrying the Castle of Knowing God. I knew that in order to get to the Castle I must walk off the stability of the cliff and trust that Jesus would carry me to the land, for there was no other way to get to the Castle. As I begin to walk forward I felt something holding me back. There were strings attached to the ground and to me. Every time I tried to walk forward I felt them tugging me back.

At the time of the dream I didn’t have a full picture of what the strings could be that were hindering me from getting closer to ultimately surrendering my all to God. I thought they could be sins. Now I think they could also be doubts, fears, a lack of trust, sneaky pride.

Why is it so hard for us to yield, surrender, or submit our lives to God? Our pride tells us we don’t need God, we can do life without Him. It whispers lies that we are better off if we are in control. We begin to look at ourselves, get our eyes off of God in all His amazing wonder. Just like Peter did (Matthew 14:22-36) when Jesus invited him to come out of the boat onto the water. He wasn’t really looking at himself but the circumstances (the waves) and he began to sink. The point was his eyes were off of Jesus.

I think there is also a hindrance called “spiritual pride”. It is the sneakiest of all pride. It is the one the Pharisees were so drowned in that they didn’t see Jesus for who He was when he was with them. People who call themselves Christians often struggle with it. I know I have. It can sneak up..we begin to get our eyes off Jesus and compare ourselves to each other. The attitude is “I am closer to God than that person” or “I do a lot more good than that person” etc. We begin to become haughty as we compare ourselves and look at others. We begin to think we are doing pretty good.

The cure to any pride is to look to Jesus. When we compare ourselves to His standard we don’t measure up. We never will. That is the whole point of the cross. God could have given us justice. We could be paying for all the ways we have wronged Him all of our sin and pride. Instead out of His love He gave us mercy and provided Jesus who took all of what we deserved so that we could again have fellowship with God.

Pride is gross in all forms and it is what produces doubt and disobedience.

Jesus came to us from a humble home. That is one reason that the Pharisees didn’t recognize Him as God. They had a picture of how things should be. They were looking for a man of influence, a rich king. That was there plan of the way He was going to come, but not God’s plan.

God’s plan is humility.

Matthew 5:5 “Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.”

Philippians 2:5-8 “Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness.”

changing a doer's mindset

“My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways,” declares the Lord. Isaiah 55:8

How do we get to this place where we are desperate for Him, poor in spirit, dust ready to be swept by the wind, clay in our Potter’s hands ready to be molded into what He wills? I always want to know the steps, the plan, the “to do” list. I say to God, “show me my sin” so I can get rid of it and “make me humble” so I can get on with doing for Him. But God doesn’t operate in lists. He operates out of relationship.

It is the same thing in regards to His will. We are seeking Him to find His will, but He says the only way you can find my will is if you are connected to me. It is not about doing for Him; He needs nothing from us. It is about this relationship that He wants from us.

If I want to know His plans I have to be connected to Him. That is how He reveals His will. No need to sit around and plan what I can do for Him. Just seek Him; not His hand, His blessing, or His will, just HIM.

So the circle comes around if I want to be connected to Him I must realize who HE is and who I am. When I realize the truth of that then I become humble, broken, teachable, moldable, without that haughty pride and I can commune with God.

“You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it; you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.”

Psalm 51:16-17

Jonathan pointed out last night during our Singles Small Group that ‘contrite’ means to be crushed into small particles or ground into powder. The same picture God showed me a few week ago of my will becoming like dust so that I can be swept away by the mighty wind (Him).

If I want a thriving relationship with God and God to work in and through my life as He wills I must yield my way, right, will, my sin, all of me to Him daily.

“But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: ‘God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.’ Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, [recognize your sin], and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Grieve, mourn and wail. Change your laughter to mourning and your joy to gloom. Humble yourselves before the Lord,

and he will lift you up.” James 4:6-10

camped out

Many years ago I had this picture that God gave me in a dream. It was too powerful of a message to just have been a random “too much pizza” dream.

I was walking in rolling fields of flowers and grain. Far off in the distance was a castle. He showed me that each field I was walking in represented a different aspect of my relationship with Him; the sheep and the Shepherd (Ezekiel 34:11-12, 14-15, John 10:1-18), clay and the Potter (Isaiah 64:8, Jeremiah 18) daughter and Father (Romans 8:14-17), servant and Master (Proverbs 31:30, Matthew 25:14-30, Luke 19:11-27), friend to Friend (John 15:15, James 2:23, Proverbs 22:11), bride and Groom (Hosea 2:19-20), etc.

As I walk through these fields I was growing closer to Him and the castle. While I was on my journey I saw a fence. There were many people camped out in front of the fence. I walked up to the people around the tents and I asked why the people were camped at the fence, each had a different excuse… “it was too high”, their “ friends or teachers were camped here", they were “comfortable”. As I heard the excuses, I begin to wonder why there would be a fence in fields that represented our relationship with God. I knew God wouldn't put up a fence (Matt. 7:7-8). So I walk up to the fence, then I walked right through it. It was a hologram! It was just in the imagination of those camped out, something they had built between them and their relationship with God.

In all the things that God is teaching me, this dream came back to my memory. It is amazing how many things are coming together for this lesson God is trying to teach me. He is trying to renew my mind to His thinking instead of my selfish prideful thinking. Every message, verse, book, bible study I read and hear all are echoing the same message…complete and utter yielding to Him.

“Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.” Matthew 5:3

Often I have wondered what Jesus meant when he said this, I assumed it mean we must be humble. The other night my husband pointed out this verse’s full meaning. There are 2 words in the original greek for our word “poor”. The one used here means: a person utterly, absolutely, destitute; a person who has no hope of surviving unless someone reaches out a hand to help.

When he was defining this, I keep picturing the people in Haiti, a country already devastated before the earthquake. I remember seeing the desperate people trying anything they could to get to the fresh food and water their families needed. Often I have thought, what would I do if it was me and my two little ones going days without food and water or my little one stuck under the rubble… what would I do to find the nourishment they so desperately needed.

When we realize our desperateness for Him then and only then can we grasp the Kingdom of heaven.